Get lean. Get strong. Get crawling.

Categories: Uncategorized Sep 02, 2013

tapeA guest post by Karen Rossler:



I’ve struggled with fat loss and lean mass gain for years.  It all started after The Amazing Cancer adventure.  (You can read about that here.)  Seemed like no matter what I tried, I’d lose some fat, gain some muscle, things would hold steady for a while, then I’d regain the fat.  Rinse and repeat.  When I started training with kettlebells three years ago, the fat melted off (a bit) and the muscle started to come on.  But, still, I was stuck – just not as lean as I wanted to be, or thought I should be given how “hard” I was working and how “clean” my diet was.

About 3 months ago, I was diagnosed with a gnarly subluxated L5 (yes, that’s the scientifical term – “gnarly”).  I was 4 months away from my SFG Level II certification and was just shy of completely freaking out.  For my age (just turned 50) and weight at the time, I had to military press a 20kg kettlebell.  I wanted to lose a few pounds to be in the 16kg pressing range.  I had just finished 6 months of physical therapy for my right shoulder and didn’t trust that I’d be strong enough to press the 20kg.  Hmmm, definitely some head trash that needed to be lost along with some fat!

I did what I always do when faced with a training dilemma.  I contacted Geoff and signed on for private training.  I had success earlier this year with Kettlebell EXTREME – lost fat, gained a 20kg get up – so I knew I’d be able to do what most think is impossible:  lose fat, gain strength.  The trick was to do this without kettlebells.  My doc put me on a strict “no lifting” Rx – for 6 weeks.  So 6 out of 16 weeks of my SFG prep time would be without kettlebells.

Now, a normal person would have completely wigged out.  I’m not normal.  Not even close.  And I’m good with that.  My favorite quote is one from Hannibal:  “We shall find a way, or make one.”  Or this one by me:  “Programming by Geoff Neupert.  Awesomeness by me.”

Geoff’s plan?  OS resets and crawling.  Lots and lots of crawling, with crawling on the side.  And crawling for dessert.  Baby crawling to start, forward and backward for time 5 days out of 7.  My first time out, I could not believe how long 20 minutes took!  Or how many bees were out there.  And yes, I got stung.  Right in the middle of my palm.  It hurt.  It hurt a LOT.  I bought gloves.  I went out and crawled the next day, swollen itchy hand and all.  Day by day, I got better, got faster, went further, got stronger.

Second week saw me doing leopard crawls, or as I call it “Revenge of the Quads of Fire”.  My total distance the first day was 116 yards total in about 20 minutes.  Each session, I went further than the last.  Week 4 saw me leopard crawl 100 yards nonstop.  It took less than 3 minutes.  And I had lost 3% body fat.  Nice.

Next challenge was 400 yards total.  It took an hour.  It was awesome.  With the fat loss, I felt less and less like a happy hippo, and more and more like a ninja leopard woman.  And I was feeling so strong.  Invincible.

Week 7, Geoff added in 2 days of kettlebell training and kept three days of crawling.  Not gonna lie, I knew I would miss crawling 5 days a week.  And then Geoff challenged me to do 400 yards in 30 minutes.  That’s right – half the time it was taking me.  Half.  “Revenge of the Burning Quads, Part II”, now playing at a lawn near you.  First time out, 220 yards.  Just like before, I went further, got stronger each session.  Added in backward leopard crawls, cuz, you know, they are completely awesome and give your burning quads a rest.  Sure, your arms are about to go numb, but hey, your quads feel great!  Three days into this challenge, I did 412 yards in 33 minutes.  Psyched!  Strong!  Lean(er)!

After 12 weeks, I’ve been amazed by quite a few things.
  1. I can go out and completely blast myself with high volume crawling – now with a 40# chain of awesomeness – and the next day, I feel like I can do anything.  I’m not destroyed.  I’m resilient.  I’m bulletproof.  Bees don’t dare come near me.

  2. I’m sleeping well.  I’m calmer.  My thoughts are clearer.

  3. I’m stronger.

  4. I’m leaner.

  5. I bought a bikini.


I'm dropping fat like crazy and adding muscle.  Over the past 12 weeks, I've lost 7% body fat, lost 3” from my waist in a month (measured at the belly button), and gained 11# lean mass.  And all I've done is crawled like a ninja leopard woman and just 2 days of KB training.

And that 20kg press?  I own it.  I totally own it.  Anytime, anywhere.  I own it.  The 24kg is quaking.  It’s been warned.

And how awesome are the OS resets?  A few days ago, I was heading out to run errands.  I walked past the 20kg and thought, “I wanna press that.”  I did about 10 rocks and 5 neck nods, stood up and pressed that sucker.  No elaborate warm up.  No psyching myself up for a big lift.  Just the desire and the deed was done.

So what do you want to do?  Get lean?  Get strong?  Get crawling!



Karen Rossler is an SFG-certified kettlebell instructor, CK-FMS certified movement specialist, ISSA-CFT certified trainer and a member of the OS leadership team.  You can find her in Washington, DC and online at https://sisustrength.com.  She’s the one with the chain.

Comments (0)


Add a Comment

Please login to comment.